Where's the Pause Button?

I'm an emotional wreck today. I don't know why. Well, that's not entirely true.....I do know I'm torn up over the fact that tomorrow my new lil bundle of joy will officially be 1 month old. (That's him above when he was less than 15 minutes old.) But why the heck am I crying over this??? I seriously feel like EVERYTHING makes me tear up. You know, kinda like when you are pregnant and you just blame it on your hormones? Yeah. I'm STILL a big cry baby one month later. Maybe it's because I'm stopping to realize how blessed I am on a daily basis. Or maybe because I'm so thankful I have healthy children and haven't had to experience the heart ache of losing one or the stress of major medical issues. Or maybe it's just the simple truth that I'm becoming a big softy in my old age. :) Which leads to my second truth.....I hate the fact that I'm sneaking up on the big 3-0 wayyyyyy too fast. After all, next year is my 10 year class reunion..... And seriously, I don't feel that old. But where did the last 9 years go?? I have been thinking of this for days now and can't seem to help but get emotional once again. So much has happened in the last 9 years, yet I feel like it's only been a year or two since I was fresh out of High School and venturing out to start a new chapter in my life. Then reality slaps me in the face and reminds me that I'm 27....or is it 28? Greeeaaattt, I don't even remember how old I am any more! Life has been flying by me and my children are growing and changing drastically each day and all I want to do is reach out and grasp on to it all and push pause. Freeze everything. But I can't. So instead I have decided to capture every single little moment on film. I'm already addicted to taking photos and use my camera almost daily. But I've decided to make use of my dusty video camera and record everything so that one day I can sit down and watch my Kyran snore in his sleep or hear his baby cry. So that I can watch Kendall be goofy and listen to her read a book to me once again. So that I can remember Kolby's toothless grin and watch him ride his bike. I want to hold on to every little tiny over-looked part of our lives and since I can't push pause on life I will push record on my video camera and enjoy the ride......